Love

July 27, 2010
I held Cole just a little tighter today... and not just because he wouldn't nap and by bedtime was hysterical... but because I was reminded just how lucky I am to have him. Without going into details, my brother and sister-in-law are going through a really hard time right now. I don't know how they feel or what to say since I've never gone through this myself. I'm at a loss for words and aching for them. As weird as it may sound, their experience has quickly reminded me to be grateful for every cry, poopy diaper, smile, laugh, and coo. Grateful for this sweet little boy, with his wild blonde hair, who wants me to hold him all day long. I love him so much and can't imagine life without him (or Pearl for that matter). I am eternally indebted to my Heavenly Father for this wonderful gift to be a mother. I know families are eternal. I believe things have a way of working out when all hope seems lost and when we are in our deepest despairs. And even though we still experience the pain in these moments, I know there is a plan that can bring us greater joy than we can possibly imagine if we can just hold on. I hope and pray Jesse and Emily can find comfort in knowing this too.